a warning to time

slow down! you’re going too fast

i should give you a speeding ticket, cheetah.

the breath went out of me when you whizzed past

you tricky thing, you.

like a snake in the grass

you slithered up to me and bit me in the ankle

injecting me with your sour venom

that brings fire to my veins

and a sorrow to my heart

you monkey!

swinging from vine to vine, chittering wildly for hours

and dangling my prized possessions just a hair from my grasp

snatching them away and laughing when i try to wrangle them from your hands

but yet when i ignore you, you are gone in a flash

escaping from the corner of my eye

to become hidden and silent

as if you are sorry for what you have done to me.

you dazzle me with your peacock tail of countless distractions

and false convictions

making me waste what was greatly needed.

When i urge you forward, you become stubborn as a mule

and refuse to go

until your needs are met.

You are gloriously infuriating, Time

stop making a zoo out of me.

 

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words

they say loose lips sink ships

but i say

loose lips sink ships

only if those lips direct the cannon

only if they light the fire

at a sullen sailor’s simmering silence

to break down what they think is a threat

even if the ship shows signs of internal suffering

scattered seashells sighing into the sides of the ship

and i

i know those who point

and cry out to this ship

do not fear for the passengers

but fear for themselves

they watch a damaged deck screaming with the heaving hearts of thousands

without flinching

but wail when a victorious vessel touches the shore

too close for comfort

their mouths pinching closed

and spitting out bullets

curse words and slurs

or stretching wide open

and swallowing the ship whole

stomaching it like a bad meal

instead of a blessed beauty

sailors, stand your ground

let your loose lips sink the right ships

and end a fight

that never should have started

possession

you make me cry, and laugh, and weep

yet in your eyes my soul you keep

you make me swim through waters deep

with you i wake, with you i sleep

never tiring of counting sheep

like water i flow, like blood i seep

through rivers of veins and mountains steep

i rise to sow, i bend to reap

my scattered memories in a tiny heap

my wolf stays watching, ready to leap

through frugal savings i worked to sweep

you make me cry, and laugh, and weep

yet in your eyes my soul you keep.

The Storm

The storm is like a scream

angry and shaking

shaking the leaves

leaves of the branches

branches on my tree

repetitive hits

on my glass window

How is it not bruised yet?

I hear the force

I feel the fear

I see nothing-

my eyes are closed.

Lightning strikes

the flash wakes me

but I was never asleep

Thunder shakes my bones

dry and deep

I turn over in bed

but suddenly i’m falling

down

down

down

down into the sea of tears

or maybe

it’s a sea of fears

or maybe

it’s a sea of stars

up

up

falling    up

up into an empty sky

how did all of this happen

from a simple storm?

 

lucia

bodies

bodies for sale!

bodies for sale!

big ones, small ones

white ones, black ones, brown ones

some with soft round curves

some with strong full muscles

some with lightning bolts

and milk-in-tea skin

and battle scars

which are part of our rare special collection

some with stomachs that roll over like beach waves or puff like marshmallows

some that emit beautiful deep throated laughing

or melodic high pitched giggling

come get your bodies here!

if you can’t get a brand new one,

our gently used ones are in pristine condition as well

however, we sell both at the same price

we make sure that all of our customers get top quality

all our bodies with black hearts are half off

we tried to sell them full value for a while, but it turns out they were rotten

look, but don’t touch, sir

no two bodies are the same

which is our pride trademark in the industry

each body comes with its own care instructions

to ensure long-lasting results

and fulltime appreciation

because once you buy a body,

there are no refunds.

transformation

today i

looked in the mirror

and saw my july self

bright rosy cheeks

and curly hair

and i remembered my january self

with limp ragged hair

pale and tired

hating myself the minute i wake up

how i wish i could stay in july

and freeze time

today i felt tomorrow

rearing its ugly september horns

i feel the fire in my soul leaving my body

little by little, as if i’m exhaling out pieces

it shakes my chest and burns my tongue

leaving nothing but a cold ball inside

if i can’t have it exactly the same

all i ask is that it be better.

this is the last week of my life

i saw the dark circles in the reflection of the window where my eyes were supposed to be

my body already physically aware of change

like an anxious animal before a storm

i saw in today

the workings of tomorrow

rushing in faster than i can grab it

like trying to catch a fish with my bare hands

i am leaving my home

that i never grew up in

barrier

i opened that door

and my lungs collapsed

seeing him in civilian clothing

i in my uniform

only made it more real

adieu, adieu

she’s going too

standing in the parking lot

with her black jacket

and my blue melted heart in her hands

my brain was frozen that day

with what happened

with what could have been

with what should be

we’re responsible for them, they said

the words bouncing in my tennis court mind

mumbling an “i’ll see you later”

even though we both know

when that will be

turning around and walking out

not looking back

my fire turning to ice

they treated them like animals

like tigers in a cage

ravenous and uncontrollable

is what they will be remembered for

sitting on the hard stone

until my blood ran cold

and the lampposts turned on

signaling the end of the day for many

and the end of a paradise

for me

 

felicity

i sit at the edge of the window

so dizzyingly close to the glass i feel i might tip over

and exhale my warm breath into gritty sands

that bend and crack, adjusting to my weight

looking up at night

and seeing the constellation’s constant revelations

to me, and i think about

waterfalls, sliding down over rocks

their banks clustered with shamrocks and shiny green ferns

trees opening their hands, exposing their organs to

unsuspecting hummingbirds with needle thin beaks

feeling the warm puff of my cat’s soft pink nose

as he leans against me, his cheek to my arm

rumbling his sleepy melody into the curve of my elbow

oblivious to the complexities

his owner must untangle

the cold slips into my stomach and stops my throat

leaving me in a tundra of frozen desires and destructions

watching as i grind my hand so hard on asphalt

that my skin unfurls its

lovely crimson dew

like droplets on a leaf.

i may not know much

i may be human

but simplicity is my felicity.

urban beach

i have a love-hate relationship with road trips

i hate the cramped-sardine feeling i get in the car

suffocating me enough that i must

curl up in a ball

my nose bumping into the hollow of my knee

in an attempt to pack my body in as much as possible

i hate the waiting

my eyes jumping and skipping from one hay field to the next

watching lazy cows graze in the summer heat

and birds taunt me with their winged freedom

flying close, close

then flitting away, like they’re afraid

i will reach out and drain them of their liberation

like water from a sponge

but i love road trips too

i love the gentle lull of the wheels on the highway

with the occasional soft thump from holes

are the waves on my beach

i love looking at welcome signs and feeling relief

that to some people, this is home

while i am a willing stranger

they know every back road

every turn or imperfection of their town

i love that we coexist gladly

and they are the unknown tourists on my beach

i am very grateful to them

i love that they do not know my name

and are in that crowded backseat with me

on my road trip

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